I Escaped

Oct 23rd, 2011 In: Voices of Violence By: Comments 2

After watching the film Sin by Silence I felt very grateful to have gotten out when I did. I was in a domestic violence relationship as a teenager. He was my first boyfriend, my first love, and the first man I was with. He was charming and protective, then he was jealous and demanding. I had all the signs yet I remained “in love” and submissive. I thought it was a phase whenever he would call me names, I thought it was just because he was angry although not necessarily at me. However, the verbal and emotional abuse escalated to physical abuse. He was a drug user, I later discovered. His addiction made him into someone completely different and that made him beat me.

Fortunately, I escaped before he had the chance to take my life, although he did try many times. However, although I am not in jail like all these women, I too feel very trapped still. After leaving him, two weeks later I found out I was pregnant. I kept the baby, she is a girl. I love her to death but I feel horrible that because of my stupidity she will grow up without a father, and I know it’s not my fault he beat me, but I feel that if I would have gotten out sooner, she would not have to go through this. That is why I feel for all the women in jail because I know a lot have children and I would give anything for my daughter, thus I could not imagine my life without her.

Did you like this? Share it:

2 Responses so far.

  1. wanda says:

    than k you for sharing your story and thank you the women of cwaa-i am a survivor as well and have begun to dedicate my time to making a difference in this tragic area. i have had women on my job confide in me, young and old. all my experiences to date have inspired me to begin work with another survivor on a documentary about domestic violence, we asked for participants and rec;d many responses- i am so glad and empowered and encouraged that women want to tell their stories now- we are no longer afraid to talk about it- i will be writing to each of these women and encouraging others to do so as well- God bless you all- i will be spreading the word as far as i can.

  2. Crystal says:

    I am so moved after watching this video, and so thankful that I too got out when i did. It is inspiring to learn of Brenda’s story. I left my abuser when my son what not yet two, and I am so blessed to have him with me safe every night. It has not yet been two years since I left, and my ex husband now knows where we live. The restraining order has now expired, and he is allowed to pick up our son a few days a week for 4 hours of visitation. I pray every day that my son returns safely every time he is with him. It is easy to forget as time goes on and things seem to cool down (as all of the survivors know). I fear sometimes that this past year of him being passive, not judging and not trying to manipulate is just a ploy. I am constantly waiting for the next moment of violence, but I pray it never reaches that level again. I am finally graduating since I have been out on my own, and I am looking to get seriously involved in helping other women as they seem to be asking my advice at every turn. This project is a wonderful start. We need advocacy groups all over the country and educated individuals helping everywhere. The silence needs to be broken. Blessings to all who have survived… one day at a time.

Leave a Reply