Funny how it’s easier to blame the victim, than to offer help.

One must ask themselves if they put effort into helping rather than furthering the abuse with harsh words and criticism then maybe, just maybe, they could being to hear the pain.
Pain has many disguises, just as an abused survivor does.  Of course, there’s one we share with those we love and care about, and then, when we’re alone in the quiet recesses of our own minds, we sometimes allow ourselves the chance to take a glimpse into what has become our past, NOT our present.

What no longer controls us and keeps us frozen.  Instead, what makes us more determined, wiser, empowered.

Pain, fear, loneliness, isolation…what does this mean today?  My past!!!!

Douglas writes…

“Jean August Dominique Ingres painted The Valpincon Bather in 1808.  200 years later, it remains a totemic work…

As a painter, it is a challenge… an image only attempted by the foolhardy, the arrogant, or the naïve.  It is your work that has inspired me to take my first attempt at it.  You have afforded me a context which is not just stylistic or decorative… it is socially relevant.       

The Prisoner, is a soulful image, about the transcendent human spirit.  Radiant in her stillness, the light flares across the window, obscuring the bars and her landscape.  In her gaze, she is completely engrossed, oblivious to her surroundings; and we are left, the voyeur…watching from behind…as she is…bathing in the light.”

Never forget that you are a woman of worth!  A woman that deserves respect!  A woman that needs love!

If you have a situation where you can not get out ask for help and don’t allow your self to get to a point that you are going to regret it all of your life.

Sometimes you stay with your spouse because you think you are doing a good thing for your kids but in all reality you are hurting them more.

This year, proceeds from the 5k will go towards victims of domestic violence through the “Sin by Silence” documentary project. Funds will also be given to Pathways to Independence, an organization that helps abused women within the community by providing safety, education and long-term support.

Although a fixture at VU for several years now, the Vanguard 5K will highlight bands from the university who will play their music along the route of the 5K as an encouragement to those participating in the race.

After the race, the event will conclude with awards for those who have raised the most money for the event, as well as for the fastest runners both under and over thirty, the most interesting running attire, and the most encouraging band.

Past events have been highly successful, with the 2006 5K raising $5000 for local charities. With a strong response from the community, a high turn out is anticipated again for this year’s race.

To learn more about how you can get involved in the Vanguard 5k Rock-a-thon, please visit www.Vanguard5k.com. The registration fee is $20 and each participant is encouraged to find sponsors for their involvement in order to raise additional funds for the charities.

I want to stop. Stop everything. Stop beating my self up for a while. Sadly, time slips by. Too many fights, too many people waiting for me to fail, too many friends counting on me to leave. Haven’t I had enough yet? Time will tell.

No excuses. No apologies. No regrets.

The call to 911 was probably very humorous to the operator on the other end. “I’m sorry that I’m calling. It’s probably nothing. This is so stupid that I am calling. But, there is a couple fighting in an apartment somewhere above me and I just sense something is wrong. The woman repeatedly keeps pleading him to stop.” A few minutes later officers arrived at the building trying to figure out which door to knock on. Again, I repeatedly kept apologizing and saying “oh, it’s probably nothing.”

But, today, I am glad that I called the police because it really could have been something! I haven’t heard any arguments or yelling coming from that unknown apartment. Now, maybe that is a bad thing. Maybe I shouldn’t have called the police. But, I feel that this is the dilemma that a lot of people face when we sense that something might be wrong. But, I believe in not turning my back on something and pretending that nothing is wrong. I only hope that more people would do something too!

By the time I was 8, my mother had left him, but things just got worse and worse from there. He threw fits. Screamed and screamed that my mother was being a selfish bitch, that she had no right to leave him. He threatened suicide. When that didn’t work, he threatened to come after us instead. I can remember being this little kid sleeping on the floor of my mothers bedroom. Me, my sister and my mom all huddled together on the floor, trying to stay out of harms way by not sleeping exposed to a window. Next he came to the house and stole all of our clothes. He knew that by including my sister and I in his games that he was creating the ultimate torture for my Mom. The easiest way to hurt her is to hurt us. It went on like this for nearly a year.

Eventually he moved on. He realized that he was not going to be returning to our home no matter how hard he tried or what he threatened. But the damage remained.

I have never been able to forgive his actions. The words he used will be branded into my soul for the rest of my lifetime.

Because of him I do not have the ability to trust men, despite the fact that I have an extremely good and loyal boyfriend.

Because of him, I feel like I lost a part of my childhood that I will never get back.

My mother deserved better. My sister and I deserved better.

I’m glad that my mother was able to escape the relationship without losing her life or causing the end of someone else’s… I just wish that everyone could be so lucky.

My scars weren’t seen my many but they were seen by my child and that added to the art of self-loathing. Abuse can happen in many forms to anyone. I just never thought it would happen to me. Thank God that was a truth of my past.